camping was sooooo much fun. this was real camping. sleeping on the ground, taking shit showers, all that good stuff. i was gone for like five days...so ill try and condense it. i went with ash, erica, emily reyes (erica's friend), their family, and their extended family. not blood related, but they're still family. so yeah..i am no longer a virgin....lol, well no longer a camping virgin. haha. me and emily are not camping virgins and we aer soooo happy! well here's my vacation, in my attempts to condense it.
SUNDAY
when i got to camp it was sooo hot. the rest of ash's "family" was already there. neways. we got there and emily started acting hella crazy. i think cuz it was sooo hot that it kinda set her off. or it coulda been sumthing in the spaghetti we ate for dinner cuz at night she was talking about vaginas and she demonstrated child birth to us with two spoons and a playing card. it was strange. at night...we got so crazy in the tent (not like that, pervert). we played spoons and damn emily is freaking vicious. she swipes her hand at you. after that, we played soem more card games, but they ended up all jacked cuz emily kept on throwing cards and erica snatches things.....viciously also. hahaha. so we ende up making shadows and talking about FANDANGO commercials. haha.
oh and when all the lights were turned out, even the adults were asleep, we heard crying. it was bry bry cuz he fell out of the bed in the tent trailer. so everyone on the campgrounds could hear. ash's uncle cedo thought it was emily (little five year old girl), and apparently he doesn't like her that much. so he goes "SHUT UP!" like three minutes pass and bry bry's still crying and cedo goes "I SAID SHUT UP EMILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" hecka funny....cuz it echos through the lake. and like two days later he asks her "u wanna go tubing?" she's all happy and goes "YEAH!". so mean, cuz cedo says "well too BAD, cuz i AINT taking ya!". her face totally falls. it was so funny. but uncle glenn and adam ended up taking her. haha
MONDAY
i woke up and i had breakfast duty. every day u have a different chore...u either cook, clean, or stock the coolers for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. they have a snazzy system. well after that i went jet skiing with ash and paul. first time on a jet ski. it was pretty cool. didn't do nething fancy though. we stayed at the campsite since the pontoon was broken and couldn't take us to the beach. after jet skiing we went bobbing. first tiem for that also that's where u sit like on a banana shaped floater and that's attached to a rope which is hooked on a boat that pulls you. heeecka funny. me and ash got on, and we flipped over before it even started. haha, after that it took two tries for uncle cedo to dunk . I LUV GETTING DUNKED. hahaahaha. fun stuff.
then me, ash, erica, and emily grabbed some rafts and were just floating in the lake. talking, not doing nething, relaxing. it was fun. we were bored out there, but it felt good to be bored. bored in fremont is just dumb. bored at rollins lake is fun. just floating on the water....sleeping, thinking. haha. erica got scared cuz i was sleeping and it looked like i was falling asleep and we were hella far from shore. hahaha. then i saw ash's two cousins humping each other on a raft. one guy's head was in adam's ass. i was like....whoa, wth is that doing there. dinner was filet mignon..yum! we have hecka good dinners. and i went soooo crazy with the bug zapper. it's no ordinary fly swatter. it
ELECTRECUTES the flies. muahahahaha. and i mean i literally went crazy. timmy was giving me the strangest looks. he's sitting there with his drink halfway to his mouth and giving me side looks. haha, im like, w/e...u'll thank me when there aren't flies around ur dinner. but i swear, they're like endless!!!!! they freaking mulityply.
after dinner i sat under the stars with ash talking. we grabbed chairs and put them in the middle of the parking lot, right under the open sky. it was nicel it's soooooo pretty at night. u dont see that stuff in fremont where all the stars are shrouded by city lights and stuff. we could point out constellatins and stuff. it was liek brilliant darkness lit up with diamonds. u can really clear ur head under the night sky. makes u think about some stuff. i also saw a shooting star. it was BRIGHT. looked like fire in the sky. stars make u think...like how small we are compared to the universe. after that, everyoen went to bed so we turned in too.
TUESDAY
this was the freaking best day. we actually go to go to the beach. it's still on rollins lake, just another part of it. and i went REAL jetskiing this time. it was uncle glenn, me, and ash...heeeeelllllla funn. we went down five times. it was so funny. cuz glenn had his huge sunglasses and hat, and when he came out of the water, it was hilarious. out of those five times, once the entire jet ski flipped over. lol. took us awhile to get back upright. could be that me and ash couldn't stop laughing our heads off.
then adam took us ski bobbing. that was freaking hilarious. ashley did her annoying GREAT AMERICA scream. dang that scream is loud AND annoying. well, we're on the ski bob, and she's like yelling aobut how sex is like riding a horse. im like....wth?????? we fall over twice....first time i slam my thigh on the water. and second time i think i crushed my ribs plus ashley landed on my head. painful. but it was worth it. it's so much fun, and freakign hilarious when we get dunked
at night, back at the campsite erica's voice is better. cuz monday night, it was being hecka retarded. it was all scratchy and weird. so we called ashley's bf, paul and erica started talking. her side of the convo sounded like this
erica: hey, this is jamal
no u can't talk to ashley
ur talking to jamal
yeah, my name's jamal
hella funny. paul beleived her also. hahaha. at night a whole bunch of ppl sat around the campfire eating smores and playing killer. that's a fun game. then we moved to the deck and played uno. this was serious uno. INTENSE UNO. CHEATING UNO. VICIOUS UNO. hahaha. that was the best game of uno ever. we played on teams....kids against the adults. i sat next to glenny....dang, he was calling me out. skip, reverse, draw two. damn. the kids lost like three tiems. we sucked, even though we cheated like mad. rubber necking looking at cards, sliding cards under the talbe, hiding them under the light. funny thing is, noone out of like ten people noticed ashley slammed her uno card under the light. i was the only one staring at her. and we had names for everyoen....uncle dan the "silent killer". cuz he was so quiet during the games but he killed everyone around him. haha.
WEDNESDAY
we went to the beach again. it was my first time tubing. hecka fun. kinda like bobbing where ur pulled along by a boat. but instead of a ski bob, ur on a huge tube, hanging on for your life. i jumped so much into the air. and when i flipped over, i freaking slammed my body on the water. then i went on the ski bob with ash and daaaang...uncle cedo had no mercy. i HELLA twisted my neck when i hit the water, and i thought my leg would fall off. damn, that hecka hurt. i didn't go on the bob after that.
then while we were getting ready to go in, emily, ash, and erica wanted to hang onto the rope while we pulled into shore. so uncle cedo goes "okay". so they jump off the boat and grab the rope. im the last one on the boat when cedo goes "hey, u know what i was thinking would be really funny? if u just took that rope and unhooked it from the boat so they would be stranded out there with the bob." and he's trying to suppress his laugh. so i make like im about to jump in the water too but instead i unhook it.....and sooooo funny. they're like yelling at me! "TRAITOR, WHY'D U DO THAT. IM GONNA GET U BACK! TRAITOR". duuuuude. that was sooo funny. i couldn't stop laughing. and they did get me back. im sitting on the sand digging and erica and emily come with a HUGE ass bucket filled to rim and dump the entire thing over my head. well im sitting on my towel. so THAT gets drenched. dang. they totally caught me off guard. cuz i was seriously loopy then. i was laughing so hard i dont even know why i was laughing. i was freaking cracking up, laughing so hard my stomach was hurting. it was the sand, i was obsessed with making a sand castle....and it looked really gay..it was so funny. lol.
then i wanted to go jet skiing again with ashley, and timmy said he would take us
ash: i dont feel like going nemore
me talking to timmy: well i dont wanna go either. it's not fun by myself
timmy: what the hell. dont i count as a person? am i nobody now? thanks....
me and ash cracking up
ash: well yenno, she's scared cuz she doesn't want to get raped
timmy: WHAT THE HELL? RAPED??????
everyone starts cracking up
i wish i coula frozen the moment when ashley said I didn't wanna get raped. cuz his face was like utter shock, surprise, and humor. soooooooooooooooo funny. but we ended up going with timmy. and he ripped us up. we got banged around, flew up in the air on teh jetski. dang. got sand burn on our butts. and we got dunked twice. by we, i mean me and ash. cuz of those two times we fell timmy didn't fall at all.....we're trying to bring him down with us, but it doesn't work...mr.i-never-fall-off-with-my-passengers. he just sits on the jetski and laughs at us. but wtih him, we went around the WHOLE LAKE. all of it. it's so nice. relaxing....well it's relaxing when he's not trying to kill us.
when we went back to camp i ate the best dinner. yummy chicken. hella good, best chicken ever. then we played uno again. fun stuff. half the people were sitting at teh table waiting and the otehr people are at the docks. so we yell across the lake, "UUUNOOOOO". and they yell back "WE'RE COOOOMING". hecka funny, cuz it echos and all. well this time the kids won. we kicked their ass. glenny was on our team and he goes "YEAH, KIDS RULE." and he's like 21. haha. again with the nicknames, ash named aunt cindy "the loud killer". ahahahah...u have to had seen our uno games. ppl hold their cards to their chest, they turn around to look at them....cindy brought a mini flashlight that she tied around her wrist to see her cards. hhaha....and timmy's all tripping cuz he never gets to go. lol. ppl skip him or reverse it next to him...he's all "JUST LET ME PUT DOWN A DAMN CARD!" and brenna sat next to me....glenny's gf has a sick twisted cruel mind. hahahaa....YEAH, we're vicious. and cheaters. =D
oh! before dinner, i went to the bathrooms to take a shower, and there was a woman there naked. like stark naked. her daughter goes, "mom ur naked." and her mom's all "i dont care, they're all girls who cares." im thinking....yeah i know.but still. we dont wanna see u naked. and she's standing there for like twenty minutes. o-m-g. that was so disgusting....i mean i go to the bathrooms to shower, not to see bad porno. gross.
THURSDAY
well im back home, and im sooooooooooooo sore. sooo sore. i can't move my neck. at all. it's like a pain to put up my hair. i can tilt it a little to both sides, but it wont move. and my lower back hella hurts. i have two fat bruises on my right leg, cut on the bottom of my left foot, rope burn under my left knee, and rope burn on my right wrist. but if i had the chance i would do the water sports again today. hahahah..they are so brutal though. those sports are vicious. they TEAR U UP. and my shoulders hurt so bad. my tennis is gonna suck for awhile, cuz moving nething from my waist up requires a lot of effort and pain. after that last jet ski run, i thought i would come back in a body cast. but it's soo much fun. worth all of it =D.
