I've just had a very enjoyable evening involving a pizookie party platter at BJ's and a long conversation in Doug's dark living room. Tonight is one of those nights when I'm feeling very sad about leaving for college. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know...it's old news. I've been counting down forever, and I'm sure everyone's sick of hearing me talk about it...heck I'm even sick of thinking about it. But this isnt' something I can really hold back.

Laura and I were talking a lot tonight about college, and it's something that hasn't really hit us yet. We're both leaving in a week, and yet it seems so far away. I feel as if I have all the time in the world, but I know in reality I just have six more days. And although the full realization that I'm leaving CA hasn't really sunk in, there are times when I feel a sudden wave of sadness. Tonight is one of those times...probably because Laura brought up the fact that a lot of stuff that we're doing this week will be "lasts." The last time seeing so-and-so-person, the last time doing something in Fremont, the last get-together with a group of friends, the last time I'll be picked up and dropped off at my house by Laura, the last time I play Mario Kart, the last DC+2 hangout, the last hug, the last hello, the last goodbye, and eventually the last time I'll be in my house until December.

HAHA. I just realized I sound like I'm about to die. College isn't a death sentence, I know. But it's a new chapter in my life, and I'm leaving a lot behind...more than most people since I'm going so far. Yet, it's still a new adventure that I'm going to tackle head on....but not before I'm overcome with fits of nervousness and apprehension. Yeah, I totally just killed my brave, courageous, warrior-like attitude with the last part of that sentence.

On another note, I'm very uneasy about starting a Rotaract Club. The reason? IT'S SO EFFING HARD. I would really just like to be a member in a Rotaract Club and not take on a leadership position because it's my freshman year, and I don't want to overwhelm myself. I want to focus on my academics. Starting a club is some serious hard work. Yes I know I'm a past Lt.Governor, but I was in that position in an already established district....a very strong one at that. Well regardless of all that, I decided to take the plunge, and today I emailed the Rotary District 7450 Governor. So there's no turning back now. I'll just lay low for the first semester, corresponding with Rotary but not really getting the club started until my second semester when I'm more adjusted to college-life. I think that's a good plan.

I wonder how things will be when I come back in December. Will I be the same? Will my friends be the same? Will relationships be the same between everyone? Or will everything be completely different? Will college totally have changed us? This isn't something I've been contemplating deeply; it's just thoughts that have crossed my mind.

Hm...did anyone actually read through this entire blur of an entry? I didn't delve deeply into any topic because the entry was more for my benefit so that I could get out all the thoughts crammed inside my head. Apparently at 1am there's more stuff in my head than I thought. OMGOODNESS IT'S 1:23AM?! I think David's picking me up at 11am for lunch. I'm not sure. I should find out. I guess that means I should sleep soon. But I'm in a TLN chatroom, and we're talking about music. Good songs are being thrown out left and right, and memories are flooding my mind. And I'm also downloading songs like mad with each IM.

I feel like talking on the phone, but I don't know anyone up for that at this time. It's ok, TLN is sustaining me right now =D.

DC CD MIX IS A GOOD IDEA. I APPLAUD ERIC FOR THAT IDEA.

Why am I still blogging?

I'm listening to "Here's to the Night" by Eve 6. More good memories. I like memories that actually make me smile when I think about them.

The air quality is getting worse, and so my cough is getting worse also.

I'm supposed to be getting my sleep cycle back on track, and it was working for two days. I blew it tonight. Oh well.

Ok, I'm ending this entry before I get carried away and start talking about random stuff like Laura's twitching. HAHA. Goodnight all.