I'm having a terrible week. I'm constantly stressed out and as much as I tell myself I just need to TRUST, I'm finding it so hard. There's only three days left till it's all over but HOLY SHIT THERE'S ONLY THREE DAYS for me to completely study for and take two exams, finish a chinese project, draw up two daily lesson plans for three weeks of teaching, and design a weekend workshop. Dammit.

A simple text from a friend turned my night around:

"Hey buddy. Work hard tonight. Remember that it's not by our own strength we do all things, but through Him alone. Call me if you need a joke or anything. Take care. :)"

2:45am. The night is still young. I'm gonna bang out this outline.

Classes are over. Haverfest is over. Three exams and one 15-pg paper stand between me and summer vacation. Even though I have a week and a half to do all this I already feel overwhelmed.

And my daily lesson plans for my summer job were due yesterday. I haven't done them yet. Ah I'm so angry about this. My curriculum advisor was about two weeks late in getting her corrections to me from the last assignment because she was busy. Which is understandable, but when she didn't stick to the schedule, I got screwed over because now I'm super busy studying for finals and don't have time to do my lesson plans. But I obviously have to do it because I don't have any more time to push it off. School is ending in two weeks, my job starts 5 weeks after that, and the main office needs to approve my lesson plans.

Haverfest weekend was super fun. Too much research to do now; I'll picture update sometime later.

I feel my work ethic in school taking a dive. Ok nvm I'll stop. I was going to start evaulating my performance and criticizing myself. But I changed my mind, and I'm actually going to do something about it now instead of sitting here being reflective and useless.

Finals suck.

So does your mom.

J/k.

Bye guys.

Grace is the most needed, precious, and beautiful thing I could ever be offered and yet it's so hard for me to accept. I'm glad I was brought to that realization last night. It's one area in which I have a lot of growing to do.

I feel encouraged by this...

Ephesians 2:4-9
But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ – by grace you have been saved – and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.

I'm in so much need of accountability right now. I don't know where my priorities are these days. Everything's out of whack. Not good.